Cars and Rabbits

What do you call a man with seven rabbits? Someone who should have appreciated the wisdom of the saying: 'breeding like rabbits' a lot more.

You start with one. Sold to you as a girl. Until she start humping your leg, and carefull examination reveals, that this a male specimin.

As he grew bigger, it became clear he was a personality. He eats, learns not to chew the electric wires, and not to urinate on your leg. The basics for any good housetrained pet. His neck became hairy like a lion, trying to live up to his sort, the bearded rabbit.
Now I understand most people do not see the need to train your annimals not to wee on you. Let me ellaborate. We were sitting on the bed, me, the wife and our rabbit, looking at brochures for a company car. (Studies show that rabbits who live in groups live longer than solitary animals, cause they need group interaction to stimulate their brains. Basically, being bored kils them.) So we asked the rabbit what car he prefered. He responded by putting his butt on a certain brochure.
Not my favorite.
When I told him so, he stuck his butt in the air, and pissed on my leg.

Cars, it's a man's thing, most of the time.

Pete Dogherty: Dr Phil style diagnosis

The following was written when my irritation about selfdestructing media stars made out one night with my dislike of TV shrink Dr Phil. I don't really mean the last sentence (well, not all the time) but it needs to be there, or the entire thing wouldn't make any sense at all, in my view. And I am a Hendrix fan. And Pete really bugs me lately.)

What can I say about Pete Dogherty, that hasn't been said already? After the photo's that showed him shooting up one of his fans in hs house, even my imagination needs to stretch. I was planning to make up a story on how he sprays his blood around in public, but an MTV crew beat me to that one...

So, I am afraid it's time to play Dr Phil. If we get all the facts lined up neatly, and examin them wit a cool mind, a pattern is clear, and a conclusion is inevatible:Pete is not a happy man.This is very important, cause all the smoke and mirrors (of publicity I mean, not grass and coke, we are trying to be serious here okay?) obscure the reality.
There are those who call him a selfdestructing dopehead, or those who can't wait for him to put that extra large dose of smack in his arm, before he does it to his fans. I even heared some people calling him a great musician.
I searched my brain, but I cann't remember hearing any of his bands. So I leave that to people who did listen to him. But I understand there are some people doing that in England.

Getting back to the unhappy part, the guy is a successfull musician, was dating supermodel Kate Moss and received free designer clothes cause he was seen as an icon by some fashion people. Still, he keeps on messing up his own life, instead of enjoying it.
Now to explain this all, we have to assume two things. One, being a successfull musician is pleasant job. Two, banging a supermodel is as good as they say it is. Now, I know that some of us don't like the idea of sleeping with those ultra skinny gals, but forget about that for a while. Dr Phil ignores reality all the time, so w'll do the same here.

Why does a guy, who has all that a man could wish for want to destroy himself? He feels he is living a lie. He cann't face himself any more. Kurt Cobain had the same problem. But Anybody who wakes up next to Courtney Love on a regular basis will feel a bit unhappy in the long run. But Pete is not in the same musical league, and Kate is not that ugly. Now I hear people around me discuss the possibility of Pete going six feet under this year, and how in that way he would join the list of famous, dead artist who died at 27 in that way. You know, Hendrix, Cobain...

Now, remember that the most important part was that Pete is unhappy? It doesnt have to come this far. Maybe deep down in his heart Pete just doesn't like girls that much. He surely doesn't treat them like he does. But he is afraid to admit it to himself and the world. That would make anybody unhappy. Pete, drugs are not the answer to that. Take a nice boyfriend, and dont devaluate the memory of Hendrix, Cobain and Janis Joplin by dying this year on an overdose...

There is always next year if you really don't like life.

The rise of hope for Men, and how it was crushed (in Europe)

This spring has been difficult, even for a positive camper like me. It was way to late, winter lasted to long, and then the news form the fashion world was bleak and threatening. I mean, let's face it, fashion is ussually a silly bussines, that is not hiting us guys that heavy. I mean, we might have to face it that our favorite shirt has to stay in the cabinet this year, but there is always next year.
But last couple of years fashion has given us pleasure, free entertaiment and a ever increasing view on the female figure. Fashion dictated girls that they had to wear ever lower pants, t-shirst that were shrinking on all sides and other clothes that seamed to have dumped the original idea behind clothing, to cover the human skin.
Granted, not every woman wearing this stuf should have done so. Sometimes, seeing some persons could be compared to sitting through an all night session af the 'Saw' movies and 'Henry, portrait of a serial killer' with your eyes taped open with duct tape, while sitting but-naked in a bowl of icecubes.
But in general, public transport and city centers were changed in a positive way, cause there was always something to see that could provide some entertainment, and kill time.
And then, the rumours started. The new fashion was for pants to go all the way up to the bellybutton. Gods knows what would be next. Maybe the Islamic burqa would be an inspiration to western designers. Years of commuting without any distractions, depresion, a depandency on Prozac, it all seemed to gang up on me.
But then, spring finally came, months to late. And the streets came alive with the same inspirational pictures as last year. I smiled again. I told my wife I loved here for the first time since Christmas.
Today it is raining, and the wind is cleaning the streets with icy fingers. All hope seems lost.